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I am Gluten Free

Posted on by Jenna

I have been officially diagnosed with celiac disease and off the gluten. Forever. A couple of weeks ago I had my appointment to go over the test results and meet with the dietitian. My head was spinning by the time I left. I had done some research and knew quite a bit already but the appointment was so much information in just a few short hours. I was overwhelmed to say the least.

Luckily I love almost all fruits and vegetables. I also can still eat most dairy and meats, my other two favorite food groups. It’s just the pastas and baked goods I have to find alternatives too. Oh and watch for all the hidden gluten. It is everywhere.

Weekday breakfast have been more difficult than other meals. I need something quick and easy since I eat at the office. I usually have oatmeal, jimmy dean turkey sausage and fruit. My doctor has said no oatmeal in the first year, even if certified gluten-free. I can’t find anything if the jimmy dean sausage is gluten-free. The package or website has no concrete information. I also can’t use the toaster at work so I need to be able to make it in the microwave.

The other hard part is eating out. A lot of places have gluten-free menus but they may not be appropriate for someone with celiac due to cross contamination. We like to eat locally but most aren’t listed as a place safe for someone with celiac disease. I need to call ahead and make sure it is ok for me. The majority of places listed as “safe” are chains. We can no longer pick up McDonald’s or Filibertos on the way home from work.

I have my ups and downs, some days are better than others. I feel like I am having a lot of days where I get down about not being able to eat gluten but I am sure it will get easier as time goes on. Saturday was particularly tough on me. I went to a spring training game. It was 95 degrees out, hot and sunny. I could see the Leinenkugel’s stand and people drinking beer all around. Suddenly it was all I could think of. I wanted a beer. I wanted a beer so bad. It sounded so amazing on a hot day. This was the first overwhelming temptation I have had. Obviously I knew not to have one but that didn’t quench the cravings.

I am trying to focus on the positive. I feel better already. I was walking around in a fog before. The fog has been lifted. I am still pretty exhausted but it’s not as bad. My stomach is no longer in constant pain after eating. And I have been given the opportunity to improve my food photography. I get to try new flours and recipes to make into photo shoots (and then enjoy the yummy baked goods). I just need to purchase some specialty flours and get to work!

 

(this is not an April Fool’s joke. I really do have this and need to change my entire eating habits)

Bringing up the Rear

Posted on by Jenna

Recently there has been a lot of talk about back of the pack runners all over the internet. I have not been in that position, I am usually somewhere in the middle, but I can’t help but feel for them as I read their stories. I think it is fabulous that they are out on a race course, challenging or improving themselves or whatever their reason for being there.

I recently read an article about back of packers who, even though finish before the cutoff time, receive no support.  Volunteers leave stations. Faster runners take all the free food. Race directors pack up the finish line. I feel that if a race stats cut off time is X then they should support all those who finish in X time. Water and aid stations should stay stocked and volunteers should remain as well (and I get volunteers have been out there a while but send relief or fresh volunteers). The finish line should stay up. All finishers should get their medal and banana. They earned it just as much as the rest of us.

I understand races only have roads and parks for a set amount of time but that should include the cut off time they have given participants. They have an obligation, and possibly a liability, to support those still out there within the cutoff time. When deciding on a cut off time race directors need to think of their take down time and adjust cut off time accordingly. Also, this time needs to be clearly stated on the race website, Facebook etc. If no time limit is given then you need to stay until the last runner crosses the line. That is on the race, not the runner.

Runners and walkers also have a responsibility to know their limits and estimated finish time to make sure it falls within any stated cutoff time. Yes, sometimes you have a bad run or something happens but if you know you can’t finish in the time given then don’t sign up for that race.

Personally, I was looking for a marathon to do for my very first one. I know my estimated finish time and looked at course cut off times. The one I was thinking of doing was five hours. My estimated finish time would be just under that. I want to be safe in the event something happens and I take longer so I went with a different marathon. I know my limits. I know I could have a rough race for various reasons. Maybe I don’t fuel enough. Maybe I have a bad asthma day. You just never know and I wasn’t willing to cut it that close.

I also know how much an empty aid station is. During my last half marathon I was in corral 14 out of about 25. The very first aid station was void of volunteers except one guy trying to clean up the cups and keep the tables stocked with water cups. I have done this race for the past three years and this was the first time I ever saw this. I hope it was some kind of misunderstanding and next year there will be volunteers throughout the race.

I was thinking about this blog post on my run Saturday. I was having a tough time. I hit 3 miles at just over 36 minutes, which is pretty slow for me. I just couldn’t get my legs working. I recalled an article about a women pulled from a race, with no course limit given, during mile 1 because she was doing a 12 minute mile pace. If my run had been at that race, I’d have been pulled. I was doing 13 minute pace in the first mile! When I hit 40 minutes suddenly I got my rhythm and settled into about a 9:45 pace for the last 10 minutes.

I think both sides have an obligation. Runners/walkers need to know their limits and only sign up for races the can finish. Race directors need to clearly state cutoff times and provide support through the entire stated time.

Are you a back of the pack runner? What have your experiences at races been?

Motivate Me

Posted on by Jenna

I love running. But sometimes I hate it. I can lose my momentum easily. I can misplace my motivation if not used daily. I struggle to motivate myself if I stop running for an extended period of time (usually a month or more).

Right now I have very little motivation. Or maybe I lack follow through. I want to run but I can’t bring myself to go. I got sick at the start of February and couldn’t shake the resulting cough for almost two months, which meant I couldn’t run. I am trying to get back into running. I have a schedule but I can’t stick to it every day. I do a few days and then I have an excuse.

I had a hard day at work.

I’m exhausted.

It’ll take to long to get ready, warm up etc…

It’s over 90 degrees already and I’m not ready for it.

I’m hungry so I’ll go later. (and never do)

I have to do X, Y and Z instead.

But what are some reasons I should run? Why aren’t these calling me more than the excuses? I love being outside, enjoying nature. I can get my head clear and not think for the duration of my run. Endorphin.

Logically the positives always outweigh the negatives yet the negatives seem to win out when I don’t have a routine or not training for a half marathon. Why is it easier not to go?

I just need to push myself out the door but some days that is much harder than it sounds.

What are your excuses for skipping a workout? How do you find the motivation to ignore the excuses and just do your workout?

Marathons and a Gluten-Free Diet

Posted on by Jenna

I need to figure out how to train for a marathon and eat gluten-free. I finally got up the courage to sign up for a marathon and I want to do everything I can to make sure I finish and finish strong. I have my training plan all picked out. I made sure to find one that would best fit my schedule and comfort level.

I have run three half marathons and plenty of smaller races but the marathon is quite a bit more intimidating. I remember signing up for my first half. I was nervous but knew I could do it. The marathon is a whole other beast. It seems much more difficult, so much bigger.

And now I have to worry about my diet while training. Thankfully I will know well in advance of my training start date. I will have time to experiment with what works for runs, both long and short. Also, what can I consume during? Currently I use gu and Gatorade, which are both gluten-free but what do I eat before? After?

Currently before I run I eat a bagel or toast with a nut butter or oatmeal (not gluten-free certified). After long runs I like to eat things like pizza, or something with a good mix of carbs and protein (which usually means some kind of gluten).

Distance runners depend heavily on carbs, especially gluten containing carbs. I need to rethink my fuel and training. I know it can be done as I know of one pro runner who also has celiac disease. It will just take time along with trial and error. I may bonk on long runs but I will have about five months to figure things out. I don’t mind a bit of research and recipe experimentation.

Luckily I bought the Runner’s World Cook Book with a gift card I received for Christmas and there are plenty of gluten-free recipes in there. I also have a few paleo cook books, as I like trying new recipes. I just need to find what will work for me.

I may have to stock up on Chompies gluten-free bagels. I’ve never had one but Chompies makes awesome bagels so I assume their gluten-free ones are just as good!

What do you like to eat before, after and during a run? What tips do you have for a first time marathoner?

 

Celiac Disease: Ups and Downs

Posted on by Jenna

I have really been struggling with accepting the fact that I may never eat gluten again (see, I said may, not never). It is definitely having a mental and physical effect on me.

I keep thinking, hoping all these feelings, the ups and downs will go away once I have an official diagnosis; until then it is just speculation. If I have a positive endoscopy I know it is celiac disease, until then it is just the most likely scenario.

The thoughts and feelings inhabit my life 24/7 and I can’t wait to know for sure. I feel like every aspect of my life is being affected because I don’t know. Emotionally I am all over the map.

As much as I hate to admit it, this process and possible diagnosis makes me depressed. I keep thinking of all the food I will miss out on. I think of all the amazing future restaurants I won’t be able to eat at. I think of all the new (to me) foods I won’t be able to  try. I imagine how traveling and vacations will become more difficult. I get depressed. Over food How sad am I? There are people out there with much worse going on and giving up gluten makes me depressed.

I have to relearn how to eat and how to grocery shop. I have to be that person asking the server a million questions they probably don’t know the answer to. I am already embarrassed that I may have to be that person.

I am getting misty-eyed and frustrated just writing this out. I know I have to give up gluten if I have celiac disease; I just didn’t realize it would be this hard, this emotional.

I do want to feel good again. I can’t remember what it feels like to not have digestive problems. I don’t want to hurt my body and cause future problems by continuing to eat gluten. I know it has to be done and I will do it. I just wish it was easier, less emotional.

I try to think of the positives. I will feel better. I will probably perform better in my running and workouts because I won’t be so exhausted. I can work on my creativity in several ways. I can try my hand at converting recipes to gluten-free. I can take photos of my gluten-free creations. I can further my blog and photography business during this process.

If you have celiac disease did you struggle emotionally with giving up gluten? If so, what advice would you give someone who just received a diagnosis?

Eat All The Gluten!

Posted on by Jenna

March 11th is D-Day. I have my endoscopy that afternoon. From now until the 11th I have to be sure to eat gluten. The GI specialist has basically already diagnosed me with celiac disease but the endoscopy is the icing on the cake.

I am currently on a whirlwind tour to eat all of the gluten. What do I want to eat, or try, that I won’t be able to after the 11th?

I am eating mac n cheese, having my last frozen pizza, turnovers, pop-tarts and burritos. I am going to restaurants and ordering lots of favorites made with gluten. Pizza and pitas. Cheeseburgers and fries.

I did spend some time looking at gluten-free foods at both the grocery store and Costco. It amazes me how much more expensive gluten-free food can be. At Costco we picked up a loaf of Udi’s gluten-free bread for $8.99. $9 for a loaf of bread. Seriously? Seriously. I guess some shopping around is in order. I did find out Whole Foods has an entire gluten-free bakery line. I guess I trip to Whole Foods is in order.

My life is about to make a major change and I am going out with a bang!

Can I Take Celiac Disease on Vacation?

Posted on by Jenna

Vacations will be hard.

My boyfriend and I love traveling and eating at local places, trying new things. But celiac disease will really limit what I can eat while out. It seems everything on every menu contains gluten.

Hula pie would be out. The oreo cookie crust contains gluten.
Hula pie would be out. Oreo crust has gluten.

It doesn’t help that I love foods that contain gluten. Waffles and pancakes. Garlic bread and pasta. Local beers.

Hawaii was an eye opener. I tried to limit my gluten to one meal a day. When I “saved” my gluten for dinner I felt fine all day.

We always research ahead of time where we are going to go. There were very few places that had specific gluten-free items on their menu. I had to assume with a lot of things that appeared to be gluten-free.

I think the hardest meal for me was breakfast. On vacations I love stuffing myself silly with crazy pancake or waffle dishes. I don’t eat a lot of pancakes or waffles usually so it is a special treat. I may not be able to have these ever again, as most places aren’t offering a gluten-free versions of pancakes or waffles.

All of these things I can figure out how to make at home. There are alternatives available. I will struggle while eating out, while on vacation. I know if this is celiac disease I have to give up gluten. I will feel much better but (and as bad as this sounds) giving up gluten makes me feel depressed.

One night while we were looking over menus for the next day I became very upset. I didn’t want to eat anywhere because everything I wanted on the menus would make me sick. I didn’t want to go somewhere where I would have to pick a sub par breakfast item. I didn’t want the omelet. I wanted the brioche french toast.

I love being able to just order anything off the menu. To go anywhere to eat. But now this freedom is in danger of being taken from me. I don’t have a choice anymore. I think this is what makes it most difficult. I will have to pick a runner-up meal over what I really want.

I signed up for 26.2; am I crazy?

Posted on by Jenna

I have been running off and on since college. I have run three half marathons and dozens of shorter distances over the last few years. I have dreamed about doing a marathon but have never signed up for one… until now.

My first PF Chang's half marathon. Now I will conquer their marathon!
My first PF Chang’s half marathon. Now I will conquer their marathon!

To celebrate turning 35 in 2015, I signed up for a marathon in January 2016. Yes, I am running 26.2 for the first time at 35. I don’t know why but this seems significant to me. I want to prove to myself that I can do this.

Last week I received an email from PF Chang’s Rock n Roll Arizona with the lowest price for next years event. The marathon was $80. I debated and doubted myself all week. Can I do it? What if I fail? Am I able to run more than 13.1 miles?

I posted a few thoughts on Facebook and two people from my running group said they were thinking about doing the marathon as well. They gave me the push I needed to sign up; that was the encouragement I needed. I did it. I signed up for a marathon. I know with the support of my running group I will be able to get through the training and conquer 26.2 miles. They helped me break 2:30 in the half and set a new PR 9 minutes faster than my previous PR. They are amazing, supportive people.

I figured since I was starting the blog back up for my possible celiac diagnosis that I will also start writing about running and my attempts to complete 26.2. The celiac disease and training will go hand in hand; if I have celiac disease I will need to relearn how to eat to run. It is going to be hard and will require complete dedication. It will also be an emotional undertaking as well and I know crossing that finish line will be the greatest feeling in the world.

What is one thing that scared you but became your greatest accomplishment?

Do I Have Celiac Disease?

Posted on by Jenna

I would have never thought I had such an emotional attachment to gluten but the idea that I may have to give it up for life has left me on a roller coaster of emotions. One moment I am ecstatic that I may have the solution to my digestive problems but then I am reminded of something else I may never be able to eat. The more I look into the more I realize how prevalent gluten really is. It seems to be in everything but meat and produce. Some of my favorite foods have gluten. As a runner, how will I eat for long distance and races?

It is a little depressing to think about. It is overwhelming when I start reading and researching. My brain is going from acceptance to denial every other minute. I start to accept that I might have celiac disease and then I see something, like a soft pretzel, and get incredibly sad I may never eat another one again. My emotions are all over the map.

A little background…

Pasta is a favorite and something I would have to give up.
Pasta is a favorite and something I would have to give up.

Most of my adult life I have had problem with digestive issues. I always chalked it up to IBS and lactose intolerance (and not being able to give up cheese). Towards the end of 2014 I started having more problems and I was in constant pain. I decided I needed to go to the doctor and get everything checked out. I made an appointment for January, the earliest I could get in.

The appointment was on a Wednesday and I swear they took about half my blood in the draw. The doctor said I would get my results at the end of the week, which to me meant Friday. I was surprised to have gotten a call Thursday morning. I was busy at work and unable to answer. I called back as soon as I could and of course the woman was busy. When she called back I made sure to answer. She let me know that my blood results were positive for celiac disease. Of course this doesn’t mean I have it but from my research it is pretty accurate, around 98% accurate. I also was able to look at my test results; >10 is positive. I had >100 which correlates to positive biopsies. It seems all signs point to celiac disease. The odds are not in my favor.

I have an appointment with a GI specialist in February and will most likely have an endoscopy to determine if I really do have it.

Pizza and pretzels would be out as well.
Pizza and pretzels would be out as well.

I have decided to start the blog up again to write about my possible diagnosis. It can be cathartic to write about all these thoughts and feelings tumbling through my head. If I am diagnosed I plan to write about my attempts to go gluten-free. I will try new foods and recipes. I will stumble and I will fall but I know I need to do what is best for my body.

What are your favorite foods? Do you think you could give them up for life?

Just Keep Swimming

Posted on by Jenna

I have a tendency to sabotage my goals. I can do really well for a long time but then something happens, usually at work, and I unravel. I lose my focus and drive. Usually it takes a decent amount of time for me to get back on track.

I read this quote a while back and it has stuck with me. I often think of it when things get rough. What mantra helps get you through bad days? Click the picture to view original source.
I read this quote a while back and it has stuck with me. I often think of it when things get rough. What mantra helps get you through bad days?
Click the picture to view original source.

I need to remember my goals are more important than a bad day or two at work. Instead of unraveling all my hard work I need to push through to keep going and achieve. My current work is not my end all be all. I have future plans but in order to get there I need to focus on my goals, not my job.

My goals are more important and of more worth than what goes on at work because my goals mean something to me. My goals mean more than my work. This place is just a paycheck for the time being. I have big plans for my future and I can’t let the money source ruin them.

I know I will achieve all of my goals but I know I can reach them sooner if I stop going of the rails every few months. I am working hard to reach my goals. I do not want to keep taking a step back every time I start to progress. I am actively working to better myself, to not let work and bad days bring me down.

It’s not easy and I struggle daily. But don’t we all? We only move forward by learning from our mistakes and falling on our faces. We can only hope to improve and not fall as far or as hard next time.

I let my bad day affect me last week but I actively worked to make sure it didn’t keep going. I took some time off from my goals but I made myself get back on track quicker than I usually would. That is my victory. Now that I am aware and willing to change I hope next time I will only wallow for a day or maybe even an hour. As long as I improve I am one step closer to my goals. As long as I keep going I am winning the battle.

What was your victory last week? What aspect of yourself are you working to improve? What goals are you working towards and what is your biggest obstacle?